“If I can just get this damn thing working!”

The story of my life with machines . . . old machines, new machines, computers . . . whatever. So, we found a machine that will remove the hulls from the coffee cherries leaving us with coffee seeds, i.e. coffee beans. This is supposed to do 200 kg per hour by hand, 400 kg per hour hooked up to a motor. Right! At the rate we are going maybe 10 kg per day! So lots of taking apart, cleaning, re-assembling, adjusting . . . with more adjusting, mounting, yada yada necessary.

We’re not about to put Ruiz, Sitton or Duran out of business! Actually we’ll still be selling most of our beans to the big producers, but we want to learn the entire process and hold out more for our own use.

For the birds . . . and bird watchers . . .

We’ve got some Motmots that hang out around our place . . . and yesterday I was sitting in the spa, without my camera of course, and there was a beautiful male Rufus Motmot hanging out in the garden, then he flew over to pose on a fence post . . . by the time I waddled naked and dripping wet through the house for the camera . . . of course he was gone.  We also have the Blue-crowned Motmot.  They are interesting birds, brightly colored with ping pong paddle tail feathers.   We have squirrels in Panama, not a lot like in the US, but some.  We have some black squirrels living by our house and I once saw a black squirrel chasing a Motmot out of what the squirrel considered to be “his” tree.

I must take my binoculars when I get into the spa, since yesterday I also saw a beautiful Rosy Thrush-Tanager.  These are bigger than a lot of our birds, and the male has the most vibrant red/orange breast imaginable with jet black wings.  One of the trees on the fence line gets a little seed fruit at this time of year which draws lots of birds.

Today . . . “The Big Apple!”

Today I get to do my presentation on New York, fun, since most of the folks on the world cruise of DAWN PRINCESS will be Australians.  This early out there is no way of knowing if we will be docking in Manhattan or Brooklyn.  The view of the Manhattan skyline from the Brooklyn pier is fantastic, but . . . Brooklyn is Brooklyn, and actually docking on the West Side is SO much more convenient for guests. 

Time just flies by anymore!  What ever happened to my dreams of a retirement sitting on the porch reading?  I know it would drive me nuts . . . but fantasies are good . . . aren’t they?   In preparation for my stint on ROYAL PRINCESS in now 7 weeks (!!), I’m reading the trilogy of books written by men who escaped from the French Penal Colony in Guiana and lived to write about it.  Fascinating reading!  What amazes me is how much of our approach to prisons today is really the same . . . deprivation and incarceration with no attempt at rehabilitation. 

An excellent choice!

And, oh yes, I think Obama was an excellent choice for the Nobel Peace Prize!

The Week That Was

I promised you to tell you about last week . . . once I had time to decompress a bit . . . what a week!

We’re rushing to complete the renovation of what was our Indian farm worker’s living quarters to a nice little casita for my brother Ed. It’s a 7-day-a-week job for me. I have one crew working Monday through Saturday, and another on Sundays. Not only are we renovating the casita, but we now have to add a new rest room facility for workers, and new storage, but things are moving along.

The week started when my guys reached into the wall to work on the plumbing and out popped this guy who they tell me is very “venemosa” . . .

Fortunately no one was bitten.

Then there is the tree. We have this huge tree on my neighbor’s side of the fence that almost totally hangs over my property. We grow shade grown high altitude Arabica coffee, but shade grown doesn’t necessarily mean growing under the canopy of other trees. To get the best coffee you need to control the amount of shade, and this was way too much. Since the neighbor is someone we’ve never met from Panama City, we had to go to the local Corregidor to get permission to cut down off the limb hanging over our property. In Panama every tree is protected by ANAM, the government conservation unit. It is far easier to get a gun license in Panama than it is to get a license (yes, a license!) to own a chain saw! So we had to get a permit from ANAM to cut off the limb. It has taken, I kid you not, almost TWO YEARS of paperwork, back and forth to the Corregidor, to ANAM, multiple inspections by a cast of thousands from ANAM, tons of paperwork . . . probably killed 10 trees somewhere just to provide all the paper . . . and scores of rubber stamp imprints . . . to be able to trim off the branch. Now the concept of ANAM and protecting the forests of Panama is a great idea, it’s just that it has become a boondoggle of bureaucracy and “government jobs” that can be handed out as political favors. By focusing on individual trees, and ignoring incursions destroying scores of acres of primal forest in Amistad National Park on Volcan Baru, they tend to focus on the minutia and ignore the big problem, at least IMHO. The challenge here was not only to get the big limb down, but to remove it without damaging the coffee crop underneath waiting to be harvested over the next two months.

Anyway, after two years of running around, and shuffling paper and . . . “Oh, well, we’ve changed forms, so you have to start all over again” . . . we were good to go . . . and we got the job done with no one being killed!

That’s not a monkey in blue, but one of the guys standing on the limb of the tree . . .

Since we are renovating what used to be housing for workers for my brother’s casita, we need to come up with quick, inexpensive new facilities for workers. So we decided to get a truck container to convert into housing for our worker. So we bought the back of an old United moving van. This kind of stuff is being imported into Panama constantly: not inexpensive, but cheaper and quicker than building with block and concrete, and moveable . . . well, more or less moveable.

We hired a guy to bring the container up from David. Knowing that it would be a tight squeeze on our farm, I arranged to meet the guy who was going to move the container at 8AM in David. Of course I was there . . . 15 minutes early since some habits die hard . . . and, of course, this being Panama, he didn’t show. So I drive 45 minutes back from David, having wasted most of the morning. In the rainy season you want to do this kind of thing early, before the rain. And that afternoon we had some of the hardest rain we’ve had this year. Our volcanic soil sucks up the water and . . . by afternoon is a sea of mud . . . and at 6PM as we’re sitting down to dinner . . . guess what? The guy arrives with the container! So we have this huge truck sinking into a sea of mud, and absolutely no room to maneuver.   Ah, Panama!!

Here I am thinking, “Man, I can’t wait to get back to work on the ship! I need a rest from this ‘vacation’!”

Of course since I wasn’t there to have them load the container so it would be in the right position when it was unloaded, and the guy’s son didn’t bother to pass this message on to his dad, the container came in back-asswards.  Just another Panama challenge!

So I had to find a “retro” or backhoe . . . at $35 an hour!! . . . to try and turn the container around and then lift it into position on the footings we had built.   Another three hours of nerve wracking suspense! 

Again, doing this with absolutely no room to work! Panamanians are inventive folks and somehow they managed without totally demolishing the container or anyone needing to go to the hospital. But . . . mission accomplished!

And you wonder why I drink?

“Why Panama Is The Way It Is”

Don Winner writes a very interesting and commercial blog called Panama Guide. He is sometimes controversial, always opinionated, and read by expats and locals alike. He’s generous in allowing others to use his material as long as he gets credit. I’m not in a position to assess the accuracy of his opinions in this article “Why Panama Is The Way It Is”, being a newcomer relative to Winner, but I found this piece very interesting and I think you will as well.

Have you ever noticed there simply does not seem to be a sense of justice in Panama? Take a look at the recent headlines. Bus drivers owe $22 million in unpaid tickets – they have not paid them because they don’t want to and no one is forcing them to. Two former ministers have now been charged in a corruption scandal involving the alleged embezzlement of millions of dollars of state funds. There are drug related murders on the streets of Panama daily – so many that I stopped talking about them or covering them because they are basically the same story – “there’s a dead guy, he was shot 15 times in a bad neighborhood, there are no suspects, and the police are investigating.” Hundreds if not thousands of people poisoned by contaminated medicines. First 18 people burned to death in a bus fire, caused by the removal of safety devices on the bus to force the air conditioner to keep running, and then another accident in which a drunk driver slams his dump truck into a bus packed full of people returning home from work. These are just a few examples of people who seem to have an attitude that “I can do whatever the hell I want, and no one is every going to stop me or hold me responsible for my actions.” Let me tell you why…

Born In Dictatorship:Most Panamanians alive today were born either during or after the time of Panama’s 21 year military dictatorship. First under Omar Torrijos who was then followed in power my Manuel Noriega, the rule of law in reality came down to the decisions of just one man. Either Torrijos or Noriega. I was here during the last two years of Noriega’s regime. I remember hearing stories of how people with a problem would go to see the “MAN” and he would decide the issue, one way of the other, and that was that.

Noriega Was A Drug Trafficker:One of the things Noriega did to make money was traffic cocaine. He would provide information to the US Drug Enforcement Agency, particularly about the drug trafficking activities of his rivals. And when he was sure the DEA was looking left, he would go right. He was pretty good at playing the United States for the fool. But more importantly, there were strict quotas established on how much drugs were allowed to enter Panama for local consumption. When I was here in 1987 and 1988, there were no crack heads walking around. There was cocaine available for private use, but normally that was restricted to only those people who were involved in trafficking or other illegal activities, and who paid a premium (one way of the other) to get what they wanted. And, the Panamanian Defense Forces had a great way of dealing with anyone who was caught trying to traffic drugs locally – they would simply take you out behind the barracks and shoot you dead. Thanks for playing. One thing about a ruthless dictatorship, they didn’t get caught up in a bunch of legal squabbles over due process, human rights, habeas corpus, or evidence. We caught you, you’re guilty, BLAM!

A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To Democracy:So Noriega is hauled out of Panama by the DEA (he’s still in prison), and the drug traffickers immediately began to exploit the markets that were previously denied to them – the Panamanian people. I remember seeing my first crack head, eating from a garbage bin on the streets of Bella Vista, and I actually asked someone “what’s wrong with that guy?” They quickly explained he was a addicted to crack cocaine and that all he cares about is getting his next fix. It was a strange sight, because that simply was not allowed during the years of the military dictatorship. If the PDF came across a guy like that they would have scooped him up, found his dealer, and quickly worked their way back up the chain to find the person responsible (and then BLAM!) But now with Endara in charge and Panama taking their first toddler steps toward a new democracy, all bets were off. The drugs started to invade Panama at the consumer level for the first time in several generations.

From Very Strong to Very Weak, Literally Overnight: When the PDF ran the show they knew they were in charge. Everyone knew, the people included. If you had their blessing then you could literally get away with murder. That center of power was removed literally overnight on 20 December 1989 when the US military invasion in Operation Just Cause wiped the Panamanian Defense Forces from the map. And what filled the vacuum? In the very short term – lawlessness. US Army soldiers guarded intersections while looters cleaned out stores in Ave Central, taking anything and everything of value. Since then, and this has been building over the past 20 years, Panama still has not managed to create a very strong legal and justice system which can actually try and convict criminals and hold people accountable for their actions. Panama went from a very strong PDF control to literally zero – and since then they have slowly been trying to get their mojo back.

The Rich And Powerful Can Still Do Whatever They Want:As you all know, “this is Panama.” If you have a land dispute with some rich and powerful Panamanian family your chances of winning the case are slim, even if all of the facts and evidence are clearly on your side. Justice is not blind, at all – she can see who’s who, and it’s normally the gringo who gets screwed. There are literally thousands if not millions of examples of people who have been able to get away with murder just because of their family and political connections. Look at Pedro Miguel Gonzalez, for example, who is still an indicted criminal, wanted by the United States for the terrorist assassination of US Army Sergeant Zak Hernandez, but who was able to win flawed acquittal in a Panamanian court, thanks to his father’s political influence in the PRD. And this is the same guy who has the balls to go on television to insist the government of Ricardo Martinelli release jailed education minister Belgis Castro. And, that’s my point…

They Got Used To It: Panama can no longer blame their problems on the big bad United States of America – we’ve been gone for almost a decade now. They can no longer blame their problems on a guy like Manuel Antonio Noriega – he’s been gone for almost two decades now. In fact, there’s no one left to blame but the broken and corrupt legal and judicial system created by Panama itself. The people somehow became accustomed to, and to a certain degree even tacitly accept, that the rich and powerful somehow are always able to get away with doing whatever they want. Their fathers did it when they used to get drunk with Omar, and now their sons are doing the same thing. After Endara Panama had the PRD’s Ernesto Perez Balladares as President, followed by Mireya Moscoso and now Martin Torrijos. So, in the past 15 years (and not counting the five years of Endara which were generally considered to be relatively corruption free) Panama has now had three presidents and fifteen years of fat pigs eating at the slop bucket of government money. And, until now, no one has been held responsible.

Until Now, That Is: The Panamanian people are not stupid, it just takes them awhile to learn the rules of the game. Ernesto Perez Balladares was a fluke – he never should have won but win he did. After that the five years of Mireya Moscoso was a national embarrassment – they were blatantly corrupt and they seemingly didn’t care. The electorate punished her party in the next election and put in Martin Torrijos who ran on a “zero corruption” platform. Well, now the members of his corrupt government are being arrested, literally as we speak. And finally here’s Ricardo Martinelli who thus far seems to be the genuine article. He has donated his entire salary to charity. He is running full tilt at every center of power in this country – the PRD, the Colon Free Zone, the power companies, you name it. The message is perfectly clear – there’s a new sheriff in town. And here’s the funny part – the Panamanian people have been longing for a strong and charismatic leader who will do what needs to be done, no muss, no fuss (BLAM!) That’s why they are loving Martinelli.

Some Of The Flowers Might Get Bent:That sound you hear is the grinding of gears. When you first put a truck into a gear that it’s not accustomed to using, there might be some smoke and noise, which is normal. The guys who owe $22 million dollars in back traffic tickets will have to pay their fines; either that or they don’t get to drive the bus anymore, it’s that simple. The former ministers who get caught stealing state funds will go to jail, along with the crack heads who got sentenced to five years for stealing to support their habits. Panama’s white collar criminals are in for a rude awakening – all of a sudden they are actually going to be held accountable for their actions. Martinelli is going to appoint at least four judges to the Supreme Court during his term in office, and maybe more. Panama’s Attorney General Ana Matilde Gomez can go on TV and complain that “the president can’t put anyone in jail…” Of course not, the courts and the judges do that, but if she tries to defend any of corrupt former government official then she will most likely be road kill as well. So I expect there will be a lot of noise, smoke, sparks, and maybe even some open flames for awhile, but sooner or later a new machine will emerge, one that’s capable of processing, trying, convicting, and sentencing people who simply did the wrong thing (at any level) and got caught. Notice, that is most definitely not following the model set by Perez Balladares, Moscoso, or Torrijos. The people wanted change, and now they apparently got some.

Is It Real? How much of this is show, and how much of it is meat and bone? I really don’t know. It seems to be right, but we really won’t know until the political season of January to May of 2014. You see, the only real political power capable of unseating Ricardo Martinelli and his Grand Opposition Alliance is the PRD, and if we spend the next five years talking about one criminal process after another after another after another after another, when it finally comes time for an election, the PRD’s chances of being able to unseat the CD will be slim. They won’t have any unstained soldiers left on the field.

“It Changed Him”: I was discussing all of this with a friend recently, and he observed that Martinelli’s “walking in the shoes of the people” campaign started off as a political stunt, however he actually did get out there and learn the way the real Panamanian people live their lives everyday. And, according to my friend, that process changed Martinelli in a fundamental way. What started off as slick political grand-standing had the unintentional consequence of actually causing a positive change in the man. Martinelli now apparently is taking every action with an eye towards “the people” – who also happen to outnumber the rich and powerful by about 100,000 to one. So, it’s politically astute to hold all of these guys to task. They have not figured out what’s going on yet, and while they might not like having to pay more taxes or pay their fines or go to jail if they are guilty, in the end after all of this process hopefully a stronger Panama will emerge from the other side.

Expect A Little More “BLAM”:No, you can’t just shoot the crack heads and toss their bodies into the Bay of Panama from a helicopter anymore, but you can spend more money on the criminal justice system. You can build more prisons. You can hire more prosecutors. You can hire more judges. We can do this whole “due process” thing correctly, identify and catch the bad guys, put them in prison for a long long time, and (for the first time) that will include the white collar guys who have been getting away with it forever. Scream about “due process” all you want, but when it’s all over and your guilt has been proven, then don’t whine too loudly. Just join a long line of guys who failed to recognize that the light at the end of the tunnel was actually the headlight of an oncoming train.

Copyright 2009 by Don Winner for Panama-Guide.com. Go ahead and use whatever you like as long as you credit the source. Salud

Living with Volcan Baru

OK, we are living with a volcano; if you want to get technical, I guess we are living on a volcano . . . but who wants to get “technical”?

[This, BTW, is one of the most popular things I've blogged about. I suppose a lot of kids are surfing the Web looking for information on volcanoes to cobble together for a quick report. How much easier education is with the Internet!! To say nothing of the ease of writing term papers on a computer! But since we're doing the Spanish computer translation, I thought it might help some local kids as well.]

Volcan Baru is the dominant landscape feature of Boquete and at 11,398 feet is the highest point in Panama. It is a stratovolcano, a tall, conical volcano characterized by a steep profile and periodic, explosive eruptions. Mt. St. Helen’s is also a stratovolcano. Baru “blew it’s top” in much the same way as Mt. St. Helen’s although most certainly it was a more cataclysmic and devastating event, probably happening around 1550 AD. If you click on the thumbnail to the left you can see just how much of the mountain blew away in 1550.

In 1550 Nostradamus was looking toward the future, the Jesuits were getting started and the first book on French grammar was being published. In the mountains of Chiriqui life was good for the indigenous people who lived in their own paradise. Then the mountain blew its top and wiped out the entire civilization that surrounded it.

Baru has erupted four times during the past 1,600 years, and several additional eruptions occurred in the prior 10,000 years, yet it is still considered a “young” volcano and an “active” volcano. And, yes, it could erupt again, just like half of California could be shifted off to be a separate island or an errant asteroid could wipe out Chicago. Forecasting volcanic eruptions is still pretty much a “crap shoot”, but a group of vulcanologist’s have developed a computer model called Eruption Pro 10.7 [sounds more like a condom brand for big boys]. Anyway, the “Eruption Pros” predict a less than 50% probability of Baru erupting in 2035. I’ll be 93, but I will have a great view from my bedroom window.

For the moment I’ll worry more about a terrorist “dirty bomb” or biological attack in a major world city, or Amsterdam and Venice being under water due to global warming.

The reason Baru, or any of the other volcanoes in Central America, may erupt has to do with the unique position of Panama viz a viz the four tectonic plates that more-or-less come together in the Pacific just off Panama. As these plates rub against each other they produce (just like people!) a lot of heat and friction and that results in magma lava which sometimes has to go somewhere. My daughter, the scientist, would cringe at that explanation, but . . .

So . . . do I look out the window of the bedroom in my new house in Palmira and watch at night for spectacular volcanic eruptions? Don’t hold your breath. But the US Geological Survey has gone so far as to issue a new “Eruptive History and Volcanic Hazards Assessment” for Volcan Baru.

So, here’s the real question, with ash, and gas . . . and that’s what did in many of the folks at Pompeii and Herculaneum . . . and lava flowing . . . where’s my house? Here’s a predictive assessment from USGS. The wind blows the poison gas over to the other side of the mountain: look out Volcan! The black lines show lava flow routes, and the red shows concentrations of lava build up.

Here are a few sunset pictures I posted recently of the sun setting behind Volcan Baru . . . these were taken from the spa on my back porch.

And, a blog about our life with the volcano would not be complete without you meeting my Dalmatian, Baru, who is named after the volcano!

For The Birds

Spot is under the weather . . .

. . .  and thinks wearing this disgusting plastic lamp shade around her neck is for the birds!  Spot was out with Alfonso, our Indian guy, on the back of the farm, digging furiously for something, and ended up instead on a piece of glass.  Her foot got infected and I had to take her to Chely, our local, and wonderful vet.  Chely really loves animals!  She was lovingly bathing an ancient street dog when we arrived.  It had somehow survived, unloved and uncared for, to a very old age, and was patiently sitting enjoying the warm bath.  Spot on the other hand . . . let’s just say was not eager to have her foot attended to.  With a muzzle, me with a half nelson on spot, my glasses having been knocked across the floor as 80 pounds of Dalmatian fights both of us . . . and Chely is saying, in English, “It’s OK, baby!”  Anyhow, we got Spot taken care of and just happened to have an old “lampshade” left over from two years ago when Monkey was the sick dog and our Valle Escondido neighbor, Jeff, a vet from Colorado, had to operate on Monkey. 

Don’t you love dogs? 

Thankfully we have a wonderful vet like Chely.

Boy, do we have parrots!

I should forget about dreaming of parrots along the Amazon River (on my upcoming contract with Princess on the ROYAL PRINCESS Amazon sailings), and just look out the window.  This is the time when trees on our farm the parrots love have fruit, and the parrots show up big time!  Like hundreds of them descending, almost like a plague, albeit a welcome one.  The squawk, and eat, and fly around, the sun glinting off their iridescent green feathers as they twist and turn in flight.  I’m not exaggerating with the “hundreds” bit either!

And then there are the hummingbirds . . .

The most aggressive, territorial, anti-social, and dumb, animal on the planet. They are fun to watch at the feeders, but don’t get in their way when they are attacking one another. We have four feeders, but only one is the hot, trendy, new restaurant in town where everyone is standing in line for a table. Not a “community” animal by any stretch of the imagination. It’s almost like watching a World War II areal “dog fight” when they go into action. I think they have to eat so much because the waste so much energy protecting their feeder. You have no idea how hard I had to work to get four of these selfish little creatures eating at the same time!

And dumb. Our house is very open and hummingbirds are always flying inside. We try and catch them before the dogs do, and send them back outside . . . but the stupid birds fly right back in.

The Butterfly Garden is in business!

One of the things I wanted in our garden is a “butterfly garden” that was specifically designed to attract butterflies.  So we planted a corner with flowers that are known to attract butterflies and . . . it works!  Mid-day when the sun is out we will have a couple of dozen butterflies fluttering around at any one time, and I’ve counted up to six different types at once.  My friend Shaun Valentine took these pictures and said I could share them with you.

 

 

The Parrots Are Back

These green Mealy Amazon parrots (Amazona farinosa) are fairly common in Panama.  They are 14-15 inches and have brilliant green feathers that are almost irridescent when they bank in flight and the sun shines on them.  They primarily hang out in the lowlands but in the rainy season they come up the slopes of the mountain to feed on fruit and seeds from different trees.   They usually fly together in groups of 6 to 60 or more and they are very noisy buggers.   There are two trees right next to my back porch that have little fruits that they love and there will sometimes be as many as 15 or 20 parrots busily eating . . . and not squawking.

Before storms, or when the thunder first sounds, you will see big flocks of them taking to the air.   One of the things I love early in the morning is to see flocks of these beautiful green birds flying in the little valley behind my house.  It’s one of the things that makes life on the farm special.

Our First Snake . . . INSIDE The House

OK, there are almost 130 snake species in Panama . . . but, not to fear, only 20 of those are poisonous. However, some of the poisonous ones are the most deadly in the world. But, again not to fear, your chances of dying from a snake bite are roughly the same as getting struck by lightning. And most places in Panama are within an hour of a government hospital with a supply of antivenom, and you generally have several hours to get treatment.

Yes, once in a great while we, or our workers, see snakes on our farm, and occassionally one is poisonous.

So, I knew inevitably that someday one might end up in the house. Well, it did! Thankfully it was a tiny baby of a snake and dead by the time we found it. But it does raise lots of questions . . .

How did it get inside? Did the dogs find it and bring it in? And what’s the future of our mutts if they decide to make friends with, or search and hunt for snakes?

It was in our bedroom. Panic! Did it crawl in during the night? We’re not worried about cold seeping in, so doors and windows aren’t exactly tight in Panama. It could easily have crawled under the doors. And, thanks to our rip-off artist contractor who never did finish our house after taking my money, we still don’t have screens. It’s one of many things on the agenda. [Not as simple as it sounds. Our Panamanian architect never gave any thought as to how screens were going to be attached to the doors he designed. Specificity is not part of Panamanian architectual thought.]

And what about it’s mama? The very poisonous fer de lance, which we unfortunately have in abundance, mama gives birth to up to 80 live babies at a clip! And baby snakes are actually more dangerous than their parents because they don’t know how to control the dosage of their venom and tend to shoot the works when they strike.

Is this a result of digging up the garden? When the dogs were digging furiously in the dirt were they actually chasing after snakes? [Michelle Obama has it so much easier!]

And the BIG questions: what kind of damn snake was it? I suspect some kind of vine snake . . . but we will have to see what the experts think, i.e. the guys who work on our farm.

And to think I get up in the middle of the night and walk barefoot into the bathroom.

“The devil you know is sometimes better than the devil you don’t know.”

Don’t get me wrong . . . we love living in Panama . . . even with the hassles, broken promises and at times downright dishonesty.

One of the reasons we considered leaving the US was frankly that we did not like the direction the country was taking under the Bush/Cheney regime.  That happens from time to time in countries aroundthe world.  Plus I was totally fed up withthe US justice system, fueled largely by the injustice visited on my friend Brandon Hein.  [Click on his name in the columns on the right for the whole story!]  That injustice continues: 14 years in prison for a crime nobody says he committed.  All this time waiting for the wheels of US justice to grind through appeals court after appeals court, andnow waiting over a year for the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth District to rule. 

When I looked at various countries, I also looked at their legal system.  Not all countries use the same English-law type system that the US uses.  Panama does not.  I knew that coming in, but decided that I would take a chance with a system I did not know.  So far . . . different, very different, but, for me, no problem.  But it is a “devil” I don’t know. 

We have some friends in Panama . . . or who used to be in Panama . . . who came over from England with a dream of creating a wildlife sanctuary for animals that were injured or had been taken from the wild andkept as pets illegally.  They worked with ANAM, the environmental authority in Panama, to create a unique place called “Paradise Gardens.”   The picture is one of me with a baby howler monkey they had rescued.  It was a beautiful dream . . . and they had created a marvelous operation supported in part by their neighbors and friends in Boquete.

It’s for sale now . . . more about that later . . . and you can get the idea by looking at the ad on Viviun . . . pictures too . . . http://www.viviun.com/AD-126801/

Unfortunately their dream took a tragic, and rather bizarre turn.  I’ll let them tell their story . . . and it is their story, and I’m not commenting on the accuracy one way or another, anyone’s guilt or innocence, nor the appropriateness of their decisions.  But it does give food for thought if you live as an expat in Panama, or are thinking of relocating to Panama or any other country other than your own.  Sometimes “The devil you know is better than the devil you don’t know.”

This is Paul andJenny’s letter to the friends they left behind in Boquete as published online at Boquete Community Forum:

Letter from Paul and Jenny Saban.

On 15th November 2008, My wife, Jenny and I were involved in a horrific car accident. We were hit by a car traveling at great speed and using no lights, as we turned across the PanAm highway outside Pricesmart.   Sadly, the passenger who was not wearing a seat belt, was killed. The car, which should have been doing less than 26 m.p.h. in this zone, was totally destroyed

We were both taken to hospital and I was detained there. The Doctor, I was advised later, knew that if I were released that night, I would be put into the local David jail and probably be refused access to a doctor and so I remained in the hospital for 4 days.

However, on the first night, immediately after the accident and whilst suffering great pain from internal bruising, I was taken to a police station outside of town to make a statement. Whilst there, I was offered not even a chair to sit down and was refused the use of a toilet. Outside, relatives had gathered andan officer held them at bay with a revolver. They were clamoring for blood, mine, andhad their machetes with them ready to attack me.

By 3 a.m. no-one had come to take the statement and I was returned to the hospital, 4 of us crammed into a 2 seater truck with a revolver for protection, and we ran the gauntlet of the mob. Another police truck blockaded their mini bus to stop them following.

During the next few days, an armed officer was with me all the time and I assume that this was for my own safety but it could have been to stop me running away. (Not that I could even walk at this time)!

The following day I had visits from a lawyer appointed by the insurance company, police and staff from the Court. I was not given any positive information, and was not even told that I could not drive. However, I was instructed that I had to report to the Court every Monday to sign in.  I did this with out fail until the middle of April and it would usually involve being in David for most of the day. The Court staff seem to enjoy the power that they have in making one wait.

During the next 4 months we have been plagued by anonymous phone calls in the middle of the night. We have also had to endure truck loads of sullen men usually 4 or 5, sitting in our car park and watching us come and go, never speaking, just watching.

We have discovered that the other driver has a prior conviction for driving without lights but cannot even find out if he has insurance so must assume that he does not. We have not been able to ascertain whether a drink driving or blood test was done after the accident but we did find that there were no witnesses.

A police witness statement said that there was no evidence to show that the other car was speeding!!

 At the same time we discovered that the Lawyer for the other side is well known for his dishonesty and that, not only was he trying to distort the facts of the case but also was withholding information regarding the insurance cover from his employers. Presumable he was hoping to collect the cash sum.

Around mid March, I had a meeting with my lawyer and she informed me of 2 things. 1st, that there would be a police reconstruction of the accident on 18th June and 2nd, that the other side now has 3 witnesses. Quite where these came from, or how much they were paid, one can only guess, but this goes to illustrate the problems that I face in this case.

I decided to seek the advice of another lawyer and over the course of 2 weeks, sought the advice and opinions of 4 respectable firms. Generally, they seem to agree on one point and that can be summarized thus.

I am a foreigner and as such am perceived to be wealthy. There is no way that I will win this case. The likely outcome will be that I shall be found to be guilty and sentenced to a custodial sentence which will not be commuted until I have paid over a substantial sum of money to a corrupt Judge. At that time, the sentence will be reduced and I shall be given a Community Service order which could be for as long as 4 years. (This on top of the 2 years that I might have to wait for the case to come to Court).

I am neither prepared nor willing to take the chance, especially as we would not be able to find the money required, nor to get onto that merry go round and so we decided that we would leave Panama and our beloved Paradise Gardens forever. We then discovered that I am not allowed to leave the country.

We enlisted the help of some Panamanian friends of dubious character and bribed our way out of the country. At last, the system that has been working against us has been harnessed in our favour.

Paradise Gardens will now be managed by Michelle and Yadin and both we, and the owners hope that it will continue to be a haven for animals and birds as well as an educational facility for the children of tomorrow. Please continue to offer your support to them as so many of you did to us.

Finally, our apologies for leaving so many good friends without so much as a good bye. We hope you will understand that we had no choice. We had to maintain as much secrecy as possible and to conceal our true movements from literally everyone. Had we not done it this way, our plan could have been compromised and if discovered ……………….. who would know.

Could it happen to you – probably not. We have now found that those over sixty do not go to jail. If this had happened in 2 more years time, we could have stayed. As things are, we hope this letter will go some way to stopping the rumour mongers and gossips and to act as fair warning to all. 

We are currently back ‘home’ and getting some medical treatment. We shall be keeping the same email for any one wishing to contact us.

So much for one couple’s dream of “Paradise.”

Mailbag and More

John is cruising to Panama . . .

First time cruisng canal. 10 days on RCCL Jewel. We thought it would be good to stay on board for the canal experience. if you disagree what tours do you recommend. John

John, I believe JEWEL is doing the 10-day roundtrip from Florida which takes you through Gatun Locks and into Gatun Lake, where you havethe option of taking tours to see some of Panama. I definitely recommend that you GET OFF THE SHIP and take advantage of the opportunity to see a little of Panama. The trip back through Gatun Locks is exactly the same, so you’re not missing anything. If you are interested in the “canal experience” take the canal ferry tour which will take you through the other two sets of locks, under both bridges, and out to Amador before taking a bus back to the ship. RCCL uses Cristobal pier which has nice opportunities to shop for Indian crafts right beside the ship. If you are looking for a unique cultural tour, I’d recommend the Embera Indian Village tour, the longer one if they offer two. Hope that helps!

Richard writes . . .

Sarah Palin makes Dan Quayle look like the president of a MENSA chapter.

No comment.

Susan has a dream . . .

I read your blog daily from Arizona. We made our first trip to Panama in June of 2007 already determined to move there. After visiting Panama we were even more determined to move. We placed our home on the market in August 2007 and we’re still waiting for it to sell. We’ve dropped the price over 20% in that time. We visited Panama again this year and we didn’t want to come back to the US. Last week, watching the stock market take a dive, I was very frustrated watching my pension drop it’s value by 14%. I needed encouragement today and luckily the stock market is up.

We are planning on moving to Volcan where our money might go a little further. We didn’t really visit Boquete long enough to get a good feel for it. Since one of my good friends from Arizona may be moving there, we will check it out further before making a decision.

I try to keep up with what’s going on down there on a daily basis. I’ve read a lot of good and bad and we’re still very determined to make it there.

Volcan is a beautiful area, no question about it. Not quite as “developed” as Boquete in terms of stores, restaurants, and expat community, which may or may not be a good thing, but I do agree your money goes further there right now. They are, however, IMHO, on the “wrong” side of Volcan Baru should it blow its top sometime in the next 5,000 years.

Stephanie had some fashion advice on which tux to pick . . .

Hi Richard, In repsonse . . . Option #1 looks like an overcoat! It’s too long. My vote is Option 2. As for Sarah Palin, even a political endorsement from God can’t help her. She’s one shy of a “six-pack.” She’s a cocky wacko with no real experience in international politics. What to be really scared of? Not Barack Obama, but Sarah Palin withthe nuclear codes. And, she still has nothing of any importance to say, not one original thought, even now with the election being so close. And she wants to extend the duties of the Vice President??? OMB!

Stephanie, I refuse to be suckered into any more political postings . . . and don’t ask me what newspapers I read either, since I just look at pictures on the Internet . . . like this one http://www.palinaspresident.us/ You’ve got to click on the pictures, decorations, windows and door around the Oval Office for the full impact.

I’m sorry, but I did decide on option #1, the one that looks like an overcoat. I want a tux that doesn’t look like a tux.

On-Again-Off-Again-Internet

The Operations Manager for Mobilephonewas kind enough to give me a call to make sure my speed was “as promised” now that they fixed something or another. Good customer service: thank you. Now if we could just work on reliability. I hate to be in the middle of a blog . . . like tonight . . . and havethe Internet go down, yet again. And it happens frequently! Is it too much to expect RELIABLE Internet??? I want speed AND reliability. Sometimes I think someone plays with the switch turning it on and off just to see if it works.

A lot to remember, but good!

A cowboy named Gary was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in northwestern Montana when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, ‘If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you havein your herd, Will you give me a calf?’ Gary looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, ‘Sure, Why not?’

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,connects it to his Singular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany . Within seconds, he receives an e-mail on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBCconnected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP Laser Jet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, ‘You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.’

‘That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,’ says Gary.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then Gary says to the young man, ‘Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?’

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, ‘Okay, why not?’

‘You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government’, says Gary.

‘Wow! That’s correct,’ says the yuppie, ‘but how did you guess that?’

‘No guessing required.’ answered the cowboy. ‘You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew,to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about cows…this bunch here is a herd of sheep. . .

Now give me back my dog.

Richard… Hope you like the joke and can use it on your cruise…Jan

Thanks, Jan!

“Hello! I’m your new neighbor!”

My name is Piero Mercanti. My wife and I recently bought a coffee plantation in Palmira, Boquete, and we would now like to build a house in our land. While browsing the net we came across your web site where we learned that you and your wife just finished building a beautiful house (congratlations!!!) in Palmira, and we were wondering if you could please direct/refer us to a builder. We would like to build a house of about 100 square meters. Our hopes are to live and farm ppermanently in our land. Thank you in advance for any information or experience you can share
with us. We hope to meet you and your wife one day. Best wishes, Piero and Karina Mercanti

Piero, Other than “don’t!”?

Seriously, welcome to the neighborhood. You will like Palmira: it’s Panama! So that’s about 1000 sq ft for us non metric folks. First about architects: I’d have a US or Canadian or where ever architect draw up the working drawings, then have a local engineer make any necessary modifications for Panmaniancode and get them stamped. I’d find a builder who speaks English. I’d talk and listen and listen and listen and talk withlots and lots of expats and locals. Locals are all related to each other and will be hesitant to giveyou a straight answer, but watch for the eye roll! Everyone has a relativethey will recommend: proceed with caution! You can’t do too much due dilligence and research. Talk to people who’velived in houses the contractor has built for four or five years. I can sure tell you who NOT to use! Well, I can’t, but talk to me and watch my eyes roll! The only really good – so far – contractors I’ve heard about are Patty & Luis – Jeff Simon is their cheerleader. Both have engineering degrees from Texas A&M, summa cum laude I believe. His is in electrical engineering. They’ve done some good work and I should have picked them, but they were $40K more, however . . . They have a number of big jobs in progress and the real question is if they will be able to continue to perform as their work load increases. A common problem in Panama is operations that get too big too fast and can’t continue to deliver.

Gutsy lady!

Hello Richard. My name is Joanne and I have been a long time reader of your blog and thought I would drop you a line before you say “Bon Voyage” in November. I have been following your trials and tribulations of building your beautiful new home in Palmira and the nightmares you and your wife have been going through. Believe me my heart goes out to you. My mother and I are also building a home in Boquete, the house is located next to the Wilson bridge on one of the river lots. We are the 1st new house. I have to say we havehad no problems with our builder what so ever. We haveonly met with him twice. Once when we put the deal together and then when we came down six weeks ago. He sends us pictures every week or so and also have friends drop by. He speaks no English and we speak no Spanish (yet). We are set to close on December 9th and are keeping our fingers crossed that we have no surprises when we get down there.

I was reading somewhere in your blog about an appliance store that you had raved about, if you don’t mind could you send me the name of that store? We are also looking for a furniture store that sells rattan chesterfields as well, if you know of any. I’m sure you are inundated withcrazy emails and requests from all sorts of folks and I’m sure you are busy with the house and preparations before your cruise. I hope you found your tuxedo! Many thanks in advance and I hope to meet you some day. Regards, Joanne Hatch, AKA: Betty from Boquete!

Hello Betty from Boquete! First, my tux is in Jacksonville, FL UPS on the way to Ft Lauderdale, where hopefully the ship’s agent will hang onto it . . . and not wear it . . . until the ship comes in and I come in November 9th. I’ll post a picture . . . probably with coat, tie, shirt . . . and no pants, the pants probably sent by mistake to Houston.

I like getting the emails: the “crazy” ones are all from folks in Africa who have millions of dollars they want to put in my bank account.

You are very gutsy to build long distance! While I don’t recommend it, I do know some folks who’ve done it successfully. Of course I know others whose builders were sending them pictures of other folks houses . . . but if you have your friends in Boquete checking that it really is your house, you should be fine. If it works out and you’ve found a good builder . . . let us all know! Sorry I will miss you in December.

The appliance store is InFox in David, ask for Alex. It’s just beyond Romero’s on the left hand side as you’re going into town. They were great for me, but another friend, Renae, was disappointed, but she was looking for Viking and GE Monogram stuff.

Church shopping . . .

If you think shopping for appliances in a new country is difficult . . .

Hey Richard, It’s Rachel . . . My husband and I have been looking at your site for hours! It’s so great to have this resource. Thank you again!

My husband and I are Christians as well. Just noticed, today, that you were in the ministry. One of our biggest questions about moving to Panama has been “Will we find a Christian church?” We are non-denominational. We’re not into man-made “religious” doctrine, just into the good-old truth from the Bible, taught in a relaxed atmosphere. I’m sure that we have had similar revelations and seek the same escape to paradise that you desired. Well, we are planning a trip very soon, probably within a month. It would be so nice to possibly meet up at some point during the trip. You are just the person we had hoped to find for guidance and friendship.

However, I’m sure that If you get some 50,000 visitors to your site you may get a lot of these sort of e-mails and may not have the time. We would understand. But, if you did have time it would be great to meet you and your wife. Best Regards, Rachel Morrison

Shopping for a church that meets your needs is tough in the US where you’ve got dozens of your particular theological stripe to choose from . . . and they have services in English. We haven’t found one. But that’s OK. You don’t have to be a member of a particular local church to be a Christian. That’s not always what I said when I was busy building churches, but it’s true. “The church” is that great body of Christian believers around the world of all colors, orientations, politics and a whole lot of different “brand” names. It’s nice if you can find a Christian community/fellowship, but if you can’t . . . really doesn’t hurt your faith any. I’ve been in churches . . . the good, the bad, and the ugly . . . for 30-some years. I used to get frustrated withthe way people behaved in churches until I took a good look at the Bible and the history of the people of God and their dealings with each other and with God. Often they were a pain in the ass to God. When I realized that I thought to myself, “Well, who am I?” There are things that I miss, especially at Christmas and Easter. I miss most of the fellowship. I definitely miss pot lucks! I miss the style of worship to which I am accustomed. I miss good church music. But there are also things I don’t miss, like all the politics and the BS and people playing their own stupid games in the name of Christ. I often thing that Psalm 2:4 – “He who sits in the heavens laughs, The Lord scoffs at them.” – may apply not only to “Why are the nations in an uproar And the peoples devising a vain thing? The kings of the earth take their stand And the rulers take counsel together Against the LORD and against His Anointed, saying, ‘Let us tear their fetters apart And cast away their cords from us!’” I think it might also apply to the People of God who are always in an “uproar and . . . devising a vain thing.”